August 1, 2018

Adult children might want to shy away from having a conversation about finances with their parents, but plenty of research shows there are negative side effects of not having this conversation at all. Approximately one-third of parents over the age of 60, for example, say that they have never discussed their needs for later in life with their family, including beneficiaries, inheritance plans, critical documents or designated representatives. Adult children often worry that these conversations will lead to conflict or make it seem like they are only after their parents’ money or are curious about matters that the parents might consider personal. Starting with one conversation is the best way to approach financial and estate planning. Having the talk about finances is helpful for avoiding elder abuse as well as protecting your adult parents from scams. 

According to research conducted by True Link Financial, elder abuse and scams contribute to the loss of more than $36 billion every single year. The right conversations about finances with your loved ones verify that an appropriate response plan is in place in the event that someone suddenly becomes disabled and is unable to make decisions for themselves. Furthermore, you will understand the signs of a scam or elder abuse so that you can take action quickly against the person who might be trying to take advantage of your loved ones.

Carving out time for a family meeting when all children are present is the right way to approach this process and begin with the basics, as launching into advanced estate and financial planning considerations can be difficult. Look at discussions from a group perspective about the end of life goals you might be considering and asking parents about theirs.

While it might seem uncomfortable, broaching serious topics is necessary, and always try to leave any judgment you have at the door because it is already difficult for your loved ones to have these conversations, to begin with. When you pull yourself out of the process and instead allow your loved ones to open up at their own pace, you will find that it is much easier to have these conversations and to understand your parent’s goals.